Happiness is not attached to any one thing in life. It is present abundantly everywhere. It should be sought consciously in order to attain permanent happiness.
If you attach our happiness to a materialistic possession (such as a mobile phone), you’ll soon be unhappy if it is lost or stolen or damaged. Your happiness, also, should not be attached to any particular thing in life, living or non-living.
The ideal state would be to have happiness as an untouchable quanta which cannot be influenced or otherwise damaged by any external agents, incidents, items or occurrences.
That said, what kind of practice do you need to be happy always? Is it simple to be so? Were you surprised by someone who was very happy and wondered how to be like him/her?
Here’s the key to a bucket load of happiness. These seven steps serve as a guide to you to attain everlasting happiness.
Make a conscious effort to be happy
This might sound funny. But it works and it is 100 percent true. “If you want to be happy, be!” Just thinking positive thoughts and telling yourself that you are happy creates a happy feeling in you.
Being satisfied is a key part of this. If you are aspiring for bigger and better things in life, that is fine. Aspiration is necessary to improve yourself. But take care to keep a limit on your expectations. Being satisfied with whatever you have now is an essential part of happiness. Only you have the key to this. No one else. Realize this and be happy!
“My happiness grows in direct proportion to my acceptance, and in inverse proportion to my expectations.” Michael J. Fox
Let go of the past
The past is always going to be stressful, especially the events that we recall often. Just remember the fact that the human mind is programmed to remember the bad thing in everything and everyone.
“Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” – Dr. Seuss
So, clinging on to the past matters such as minor truffles, relationship problems, fights and quarrels is not going to help you out emotionally. It creates undue stress, makes us feel bad about the persons involved and generally spreads negative energy all around. If you learn to let go of the past, accept it, learn from it and then forget it, your life will be a lot happier than what it is now.
“The fragrance always stays in the hand that gives the rose.” – Hada Bejar
Remember this quote. Helping others in their time of need not only gets you an ally for the battle of your life, it also makes you feel happier, earning their gratitude and respect. It is an immense feel-good factor. The sense of satisfaction in making someone’s day can only be felt by doing it. Just try it once and experience the beautiful feeling that comes with it.
Do not care about the return gift or even a courtesy thanks. But enjoy the feeling of being an important part of someone else’ life, even if only for a brief moment. Even if you don’t believe in karma, what goes around will surely come around and this will make you happier.
Don’t care about looks
Many a times, caring too much about appearances and perfection in dressing leads to unwanted stress. This can easily be avoided for a better lifestyle. Just remember that looking great is not necessary. Looking presentable is sufficient.
Beauty is always subjective and there are always some people who are not going to agree that you look fine. Just accept the fact that there is no universal beauty and relax. Try to reduce the amount of make-up. Worrying about wrinkled skin can only result in more wrinkles due to high stress levels!
Alright, this looks scary! You might be asking yourself, “How can I be happy if I don’t look good?” This point is not to encourage you to look shabby. Just take your appearance a little less seriously and try to enjoy life more.
Spend time with loved ones
If there are people that make you happy, why not spend more time with them? Spending more time with family and close friends will bring immense happiness and fill your time with joy.
For some of you, loved ones may not be your family, they may constitute a set of friends. (Take care to feel happiness in their company. This does not mean lot of enjoyment or endless partying. Just being happy.)
“Count your age by your friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears.” John Lennon
If you haven’t got anyone till now, just think about your past experiences with people and choose who have made you feel good. Surround yourself with such people and try to spend more time with them. Any relationship takes time and effort. Invest and reap great benefits.
Spend time with kids and old people
If you want to really know the value of happiness, try to spend at least a small part of your day with kids. You can get to know how to enjoy simple things in life, not care about the opinion of the others and get a fresh perspective on life. Spending time with kids will naturally energize your day. Their sweet innocence and beatific smile would make you forget your worries. Even a few minutes spent with kids will benefit you a great deal.
Old people may sound boring, but if you make an effort to spend time with them, their wisdom, insight and intuition will surprise you no end. Also, there is the gratitude factor and unconditional love which is there to make you happy. Generally uncared-for and overlooked by others, some old age people will bless you a lot if you take time to listen to them. If you habituate yourself to talk to at least one old person for at least a few minutes per day, you’ll find that this not only gives you maturity in dealing with things, but you’ll also get to know what is essentially important in your life and what is not. This information can be very valuable to make important decisions in your life which in-turn can give you long lasting happiness.
Love what you do
OR “do what you love”.
This is fundamental. If you don’t love your chosen profession, you are forever going to be grumpy, grumbling, blaming, unsatisfied and generally unhappy.
It is never too late to switch careers if you dislike (or not able to love) what you do currently. Remember that money is only a means to life and it is not the end. If you are working only for the monetary benefits, then you have definitely put yourself in a fix. You are here in this life only once, why do something that you don’t like just for the sake of money? If you feel that your present commitments will not allow you to switch jobs overnight, make the transition smooth. Take proper steps to secure financial backing, pursue your favorite profession as a part-time and gradually move towards it.
People who love their jobs and enjoy what they do are not only more happy but are also more satisfied, complete and, as a result, very friendly to be with. It is a great gift to be able to do what you love and engage in it each and everyday of your life.