These supposed-to-be jokes are real serious:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
because it had been so horrendously genetically modified in a lab that it had taken on almost human-like intelligence. Growing up in the lab, among hippy scientists and political idealists talking about the socialist revolution and liberation he thought one day, one day, he would have his freedom. Later that year, in an act of civil defiance within the chicken coop, he refused to eat the chicken feed alloted to him. As the scientists opened the cage to seize the dissident chicken, he pecked him in the eye and liberated his brothers and sisters. However, the real world was not what the chicken had expected. The rampant commercialism he saw upon his release disillusioned the young chicken to the extent that he decided to take his own life. Rising in the morning, at his usual time at 6 a.m., he leaned over and kissed his wife delicately upon the cheek, a solitary tear running down his eye as he imagined the child he knew he would never meet. The chicken stepped into the cold London morning, the frost chaffing his cheeks, the sleet crashing against his breast. Taking one step onto the busy dual-carriageway, he closed his eyes and imagined heaven….
What did the general say to his men before they got into the tank?
“Get in the tank.”
A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on a plane.
However, it is a short flight and they do not talk to each other.
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
“Where’s my tractor?”
A man walked into a bar. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart.
Why did Chuck Norris cross the road?
Nobody knows, no one has dared question his motives.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn’t really matter because he would not be able to respond to it anyway.
What’s the difference between a rottwieller and a poodle?
There are many differences. They are two totally different breeds of dog.